It’s Time to Put an End to Vanilla Shaming

I recently was discussing with a friend about the idea of “vanilla sex” and why we are so afraid of being labeled as such. Our conversation was light hearted and rooted in silly but none the less, the conversation had merit. When did we decide Vanilla Sex was boring or somehow even worthy of the title, “Vanilla?” Vanilla isn’t a bad flavor, it’s quite delicious if I may say! Sex in general, as I’ve always understood it is deeply personal and if missionary in the bed for ten minutes gets you there who are we to judge? Simply put, “sexual preferences and desires are unique to every person, and it is important for all to understand and embrace their distinctness.” Vanilla sex, which simplistically refers to sex that involves “basic” and straightforward sexual activities, has long been misunderstood and underestimated. It is high time to realize that there is no need to be ashamed of vanilla sex! Rather, it is vital to bring to light the benefits of this kind of sex and address the unfair stigma that surrounds it. So let us delve deeper into what vanilla sex is, and why we should put an end to vanilla shaming.

What is Vanilla Sex?

Vanilla sex is precisely as it sounds. It is the most fundamental form of sexual activity that one can indulge in. It mainly comprises traditional sex acts such as kissing, touching, and penetration. From missionary position to oral sex, these activities are undoubtedly the most common and the most familiar to us all. The fact that it follows a traditional format is precisely what makes vanilla sex referred to as plain and unimaginative. Still, one must note that these acts can be considered the foundation of most sexual relationships and shouldn’t be discounted.

Guess What? There are Benefits to Good Ole Vanilla Sex!

While many might believe that vanilla sex lacks excitement, it is essential to note that there are several benefits to this kind of sexual activity. It is the ideal starting point for couples who are beginning to discover their sexuality and exploring new avenues that work for them. Early in my sexual journey, vanilla sex at times was the extent of my knowledge base and what was as fulfilling as I was aware my sex life could be. In other words, often times vanilla sex is the only sex we have exposure to. Being comfortable in a vanilla space affords us the opportunity to grow if growth is our desire. For many, It is a great way to strengthen emotional connections and deepen the bond with your partner. For those starting to explore the depths of their sexual selves, the pressure of performing or trying out complicated positions or props, couples can focus on connecting with each other, thus establishing a sound basis for more adventurous acts in the future.

Let’s All Agree to Hype Up Vanilla

Understand why vanilla shaming is problematic, primarily because every individual deserves to express and enjoy their sexuality without shame or guilt. Remembering that sex is an activity that, at its core, should be practiced with mutual consent and pleasure; vanilla is simply another way of fulfillment. It is only when we put these principles into practice that we should feel liberated and relaxed about our sexual encounters. Vanilla sex might not appeal to everyone, but it is essential to embrace the diversity of sexual preferences just as in every other aspect of life. The stigma surrounding vanilla sex and the lack of knowledge about its benefits is harmful to intimate relationships. People who find themselves indulging in vanilla sex may feel left out, poorly understood, and shamed by society. It is necessary to understand that vanilla sex is essential in every sexual relationship and that we can enjoy this kind of sex without feeling guilty or ashamed. Embracing vanilla sex leads to a deeper and more substantial connection between partners that lays the foundation for more adventurous acts in the future.

Let us all live without judgment or guilt and pursue our pleasures with knowledge, enthusiasm, and consent. Remember, sex is always for everyone to enjoy in a way that works for them.

Be well all and ask for vanilla next time!